"that just doesn't make sense. if all your bumps and cuts never grew back, by the time you're old like 68 or somethin'
then you'd be gone.
you'd be nothin' but a hole!"
-ar
*****
"andrew, a stomach is like a toe. you can't just repair a toe if it falls off."
-wt
*****
db: "oh my goodness!! i'm sooooo sorry!!" (this as i cringe in horror at almost shutting his thumb in the door.)
wt: (in the sweetest, most grown-up voice possible for a 9 year old)
"it's ok, momma, just thank God it didn't fall off, but IF it fell off we could just tape it back on, easy." (shrugs)
db: "well, it's not quite THAT easy..."
wt: "or some doctors could just take off my big toe and tape it to my thumb-spot. daddy said they can do that and it's true!"
*****
wt: "oh dear, mommy!"
db: "what is it??"
wt: "i'm sorry to say i can't feel my heart beat." (says this with his hand on the right side of his chest.)
db: "try putting your hand on your HEART."
wt: (switches hands) "nope. no BUMP BUMP."
db: "oh dear wil, i hope you're still alive..."
wt: "OH I AM, MOMMA! my heart's not beating, that's all."
*****
(i hear the clinking of bottles coming from the bathroom...)
db: "wil, what are you doing back there?"
it's been a full three minutes since he's been out of my sight - just long enough to set the first stone in an avalanche of disastrous effects to tumbling.
wt: "ummmmm, momma, i have a chigger bite, ummmmmmm, on my, ummmmmmmm peter - but it's ok, i've already taken care of it. come 'ere and i'll show you!"
db: "ummmmm, no that's ok, you don't have to show me."
pause. i hear the first pebbles.
"wil, HOW did you take care of it?"
wt: "oh i just painted it with nail polish."
another pause. more pebbles.
db: "painted what?!"
wt: "my peter!"
WARNING! AVALANCHE!
db: "maybe you'd better show me after all..."
<< a couple of days later, seated quietly in the back pew at a homeschool graduation ceremony >>
wt: "HEY MOMMA LOOK! THERE'S DR. _____! I CAN SHOW HIM MY PETER AND TELL HIM THE SWELLING'S GONE DOWN!"
so much for using our 'inside voice'...
db: (hissing now) "wil, w-h-i-s-p-e-r! and NO, tonight's NOT about you, and you DON'T need to SHOW him!"
wt: "ok, i'll just tell him."
*****
db: "oh my goodness!! i'm sooooo sorry!!" (this as i cringe in horror at almost shutting his thumb in the door.)
wt: (in the sweetest, most grown-up voice possible for a 9 year old)
"it's ok, momma, just thank God it didn't fall off, but IF it fell off we could just tape it back on, easy." (shrugs)
db: "well, it's not quite THAT easy..."
wt: "or some doctors could just take off my big toe and tape it to my thumb-spot. daddy said they can do that and it's true!"
*****
wt: "oh dear, mommy!"
db: "what is it??"
wt: "i'm sorry to say i can't feel my heart beat." (says this with his hand on the right side of his chest.)
db: "try putting your hand on your HEART."
wt: (switches hands) "nope. no BUMP BUMP."
db: "oh dear wil, i hope you're still alive..."
wt: "OH I AM, MOMMA! my heart's not beating, that's all."
*****
(i hear the clinking of bottles coming from the bathroom...)
db: "wil, what are you doing back there?"
it's been a full three minutes since he's been out of my sight - just long enough to set the first stone in an avalanche of disastrous effects to tumbling.
wt: "ummmmm, momma, i have a chigger bite, ummmmmmm, on my, ummmmmmmm peter - but it's ok, i've already taken care of it. come 'ere and i'll show you!"
db: "ummmmm, no that's ok, you don't have to show me."
pause. i hear the first pebbles.
"wil, HOW did you take care of it?"
wt: "oh i just painted it with nail polish."
another pause. more pebbles.
db: "painted what?!"
wt: "my peter!"
WARNING! AVALANCHE!
db: "maybe you'd better show me after all..."
<< a couple of days later, seated quietly in the back pew at a homeschool graduation ceremony >>
wt: "HEY MOMMA LOOK! THERE'S DR. _____! I CAN SHOW HIM MY PETER AND TELL HIM THE SWELLING'S GONE DOWN!"
so much for using our 'inside voice'...
db: (hissing now) "wil, w-h-i-s-p-e-r! and NO, tonight's NOT about you, and you DON'T need to SHOW him!"
wt: "ok, i'll just tell him."
*****
