"SERIOUSLY"...

wt: "mommy, could my first all-mine pet be a water moccasin?" he says this in the sweetest, smile- voice, a practiced one that invites agreement. "because i LOVE wildlife" he adds with emphasis, kind of like a used car salesman offering to throw in a tree-shaped, rear-view air freshener to make the two toned 1974 elcamino a little more appealing.

db: "ummmmm, let me think about that one for a minute- NO."

wt: "how 'bout when i'm eight mommy?"

db: "hm, let me think again - NO!"

wt: "i meant to say when i'm eight - TEEN!"

db: "still thinking...NO!!"

wt: "twenty?" (still in smile-voice)

db: "NO."

wt: "OK, how 'bout a plain ol' rattlesnake then? and what if i built a habitat for it OUTside, because i wouldn't want to look at it INside, and then i could watch it hibernate!"

db: "NO."

wt: "well, seriously, could my first all-mine pet be a baby crocodile then?"

db: "seriously, NO."

wt: "or how 'bout an armadillo?"

db: "NO, again."

[i have to say here that this is a very unusual conversation. rarely do i just tell them NO. usually in situations where they are asking for the rare and next-to-impossible i try to go along with the creative thinking exercise and just dodge direct answers until a later, more appropriate age/date)

wt: with renewed excitement, "oh I know, mommy,

how 'bout a PARROT??!!"

db: (launches discussion about clipping birds wings, and cages, and birds never being able to fly, hopefully extinguishing any future discussion of captive birds.)

ar: (enters conversation now to go to bat for brother) "but what if the parrot flies to the people, mommy? like what if the parrot gets caught in a tornado, and the tornado carries it to some people, and the people take it inside to keep it from freezing?! now THAT'S a different kind of situation!"

db: "NO. NO birds in cages."

wt: (gone is the smile-voice, the hopeful-voice. what's left can only be called resignation.) "oh, ok, i'll just take a squirrel," (hope rekindles) "but can i keep him in my room?"

db: "NO."

wt: "how 'bout a rabbit then?"

db: "we can talk about rabbits when you're a junior in 4-H. until then let's be thankful that we have emma and frockletray."

ar: "how 'bout you ask for a baby cougar, wil, because they aren't poisonous - or maybe a baby cat!"

wt: in absolute horror, "NOOOO!!!! because daddy is allergic to babies!!!"

ar: in soothing-voice, with wisdom beyond his 8 years, "he's not allergic to BABIES, wil, he's allergic to baby CATS!"